19/11/2010
US pastor says quit Facebook to save relationships
by Laura Nineham
A pastor in New Jersey has urged his 1,100-strong congregation to quit Facebook because he says it causes so much jealousy in relationships that it's ruining marriages.
Reverend Cedric Miller said that 20 couples in his congregation have experienced marital difficulties because of Facebook, which helps spouses to reconnect with former lovers. He claims this causes arguments and leads to bitterness.
According to The Daily Mail, Rev. Miller gave his 50 married church officials an ultimatum - delete their Facebook accounts or quit. He hasn't made such demands on the congregation, however he has appealed to them to stop using the social networking site.
"People use it as an opportunity to invite others to social gatherings, to share Scripture or talk about what went on at church," he said. "Those are all positive, worthwhile things. But the downside is just too great."
"I've been in extended counselling with couples with marital problems because of Facebook for the last year and a half," Rev. Miller added. "What happens is someone from yesterday surfaces, it leads to conversations and there have been physical meet-ups. The temptation is just too great."
It's not just the Americans that are blaming Facebook for jealousy in relationships either. According to The Daily Mail, a do-it-yourself divorce website claims that the word 'Facebook' came up in one of every five petitions for divorce handled in the past.
However, as CNN commentator Roland Martin said, people are questioning just how much of a role social networking really plays in the breakdown of relationships. "The real issue is what's happening inside these marriages," Mr Martin commented.
Instead of deleting Facebook accounts, couples who are having problems with jealousy in relationships could consider hypnotherapy as a way of tackling the issue. Hypnotherapy helps couple to understand that it's their deep love for a person that fuels jealousy, it's just channelled in a misguided manner. It will help you to become calm and confident and let go of the person you love so you can nurture a healthy relationship.
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